HI jokes
Hi, welcome to June's Orphanage. You make them, we bake them. How can I help you?
Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to finish his essay, or the teacher was gonna whoop his fat butt cheeks!
The youngest of the Twin Towers said, "Goodbye, brotha." But the one who got hit, which is the oldest, said, "If I go down, you go with me!"
Why did the midget laugh when he ran? Because the grass tickles his balls.
Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.
Trump pumped and dumped his wife at the border.
Nobody:
JFK: :) Hi guys!
JFK's killer: Ayo look at this shit, I just hit a clip.
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
Dad: What did your older brother say before he lost his virginity?
Son: Dad, please don't.
Dad: Exactly.
The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.
How do you make an orphan's hand bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
I asked my boyfriend who his favorite motivational speaker was. He said Andrew Tate. I told him the BEST motivational speaker was Stephen Hawking.
After the school shooting, Joe pretended to be a victim while his sister ate the flesh of the fallen.
Did you see that car crash today where the guy got the entire left side of his body cut off?
He's all right now.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell it to clap until his/her parents are back.
Raaj went up to his mom and said, "I bet you 10 dollars I can disappear." Then he turned off the lights.
Why can't Jesus walk on water anymore?
Because he has holes in his feet.
A limbless man sat on the side of a lake every day. He had no hands or legs.
One day he was crying when a woman was walking by and saw that he was upset, so she asked if he was okay. He replied, "No."
The woman said, "Well, what's wrong?"
The limbless man said, "I've never been hugged by anyone ever."
So the woman, out of kindness, hugged the man. "Are you okay now?" she asked.
"No," the man replied. So again the woman asked him what was wrong. He answered, "I've never been kissed before."
The woman eagerly gave him a peck on the lips and asked, "Are you okay now?"
The man shook his head sadly. The woman asked him what was wrong for the third time. The man said, "I've never been fucked."
The woman looked at him, picks him up, throws him in the lake, and says, "Now you are!"