Goodluck jokes

Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"

Sometimes I just wake up in the morning, and think, "Well, better luck next time."

Guys, say "I love gape horn" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.

I was in the corner shop and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!

The number 13? Not on my watch!

If at first it doesn't succeed, try, try again.