Food Poisoning jokes

Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.

You heard that Michael Jackson autopsy reports showed he died of food poisoning?

It’s because he ate some 8 year old nuts.

I accidentally drank a little food coloring last night. I ended up dying inside.

They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, well not if it's poisoned.

Then the antidote becomes the most important.

There's an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.

I hope my teacher will be ok.

A man walks into a diner one day, walks up to the counter, and proceeds to order a bowl of chili.

The waitress says that the man sitting next to him just ordered the last bowl they had. That man was just sitting there, not eating the chili.

After watching him not eating for a while, the first man asks him, "Are you going to eat that?"

The second man replies, "No, you can have it if you want."

So the first man takes the bowl and starts eating.

About halfway through the bowl, he's chewing when he feels a crunch. He looks down only to see half a dead rat sitting in the chili.

He immediately throws all of it up, back into the bowl.

The second man looks at him and says, "Yeah, that's about as far as I got too."

I ate too many temmie flakes... I guess I got a TEMMIE ACHE!!!!