Fell jokes
I was doing a race, and I started after everyone 'cause I fell, but when I got up I realized I couldn't even race, not because I was behind, but because I can't go straight if I'm gay...
Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory, and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work.
Paddy agrees to tell Seamus' wife the bad news. He knocks on the door, and Seamus' wife answers. "What's happened, Paddy?" Paddy frowns. "I'm sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, I'm so sorry." She started to cry and asked Paddy: "Did he at least die quickly?" Seamus shook his head, "No, he got out 3 times for a pee."
One day I was eating a banana, and one my friend was eating in the balcony, so I threw my banana on his balcony. He stepped on it, so he got slipped, and one yogi was passing by me, so my friend's banana fell on his head, and he got a very nice shining half-eaten banana choti on his golden smooth head.
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone.
The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone!
The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
Stephen Hawking's family was cruel. He fell over and got told to man up and walk it off.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, but Jill fell down and Jack came tumbling down after.
(And you thought this would be a joke.)
A couple and their friends were riding their tricycle, and one wheel fell off. They discussed what to do, and finally the friend said, "Why don't you just use me?" The boyfriend said, "Why did I not think of using the third wheel?"
Joe mama so fat, when she did the IShowSpeed dance, she fell five floors down.
As a murderer, I stabbed a man after infiltrating his house. His wife came in and saw me. She fell into tears. I got up and said, "Drama queen!"
Yo mama so fat and old, she lifted her boob to wash under it, and a pilgrim fell from under it.
What did the blanket say when he fell off the bed?
Oh sheet!
There were 500 bricks on a plane. One fell off.
Little Sally was crossing a river full of crocodiles. How did she survive the river? She had a gun. When she got out of the river, she died. Why? Because a brick fell on her head.
Why did the actor fall through the floor?
He was just going through a stage!
Went swimming today and peed in the deep end. The lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.
My girlfriend has a huge crush on Jupiter, I mean she fell HARD!
If there was a girl and a boy and the boy fell, what did the boy do to the girl?
He fell for her.
Why couldn’t Helen Keller scream when she fell off the cliff?
Because she was wearing mittens.
My grandfather died at Auschwitz.
Poor fella fell off the guard tower.
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.