Estrangement jokes

My wife left me yesterday.

I haven't talked to the kids in a year.

Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.

My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either since 2005.

The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂

I wish my dad was home. I haven’t seen him since the shot of 2008.

I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.