End of life jokes

Therapist

I recently was told by my therapist to stop with the suicide jokes. So I replied with "Don't worry, it will all end soon."

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  • Suicide

    Mom: Are you seriously gonna die?

    Me: No. Don't worry. Suicide is the last thing I'll do.

    Doctor

    A doctor walks up to a dying man and sadly says: "I'm sorry, the test shows you only have 10 more to live."

    The man says "10!? 10 what!? Years? Weeks? Days? What?!!?"

    The doctor calmly replies "Nine".

    Battery

    It's said Duracell batteries are supposed to last 75 years, well Stephen, here you are.

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