Who is the smartest student in school?
The scholar.
Dear math,
Please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.
Thanks.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal; its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to Hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
Why didn't the sun go to college?
Because it already had a million degrees!
Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
What do inner city schools and databases have in common?
Their problems are usually caused by a race condition.
Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?
The Parkland kids.
How do you know you’ve been robbed by an Asian?
The house is clean, the homework is done, but the idiot is having trouble backing out of the driveway.
Stop joking about suicide, it's not funny. You people must be so ignorant to be able to joke about such serious issues that you clearly are uneducated on.
Q: What do you call a skeleton that goes to school but doesn't do any work?
A: Lazy bones.
Why does the Sun go to school? To get brighter!
Why did Sally fail her final exam?
Because she had nothing written down.
There r 3 things wong wit dis world.
1. Spelin
B. Maths
Why did Sally decide to fly to school?
She couldn't drive.
A is for apple, B is for dyslexia—oh wait, no! That’s D!
So three retards walk into a classroom...
Sike, it was the garbage. They mistook it for their classroom.
Guess who I saw at school today?
Everyone I looked at. loooooooool
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
My friend had no school because of heavy snow.
Guess you could say it was a snow school day!
Se we are in class right, and the teacher has a metal leg. Every year she gets the question of "do metal detectors beep every time you walk by them?" She herd this question to the point were she just says yes without hesitation. Once she had said yes, two kids int he back started laughing. Teacher: Ok alright, take it a little bit more seriously would you? Kid: Oh were not laughing at that. Kid_2: Were laughing at cancer.
