Dreadlock jokes

What do a pedophile and a clock have in common? Neither of them go past 12.

I can hear thunder outside, which I find weird since the lightning is on my arm...

What do you do when you get locked outside your house? You talk to the lock, because communication is key.

Mom: Wake up!

Me: No, I'm too disappointed and I have a headache...

Mom: Why are you disappointed?

Me: I took 12 random pills and I still woke up...

Go commit neck rope.