Double meaning jokes
Hi, I got fired. Oh, don't know which fire? Oh, the one that I got burned on, the volcano.
Something you can say at a job interview and during sex:
"I’m here for the new position?"
What do you call 2 spies fucking?
Undercover.
Dang... if I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put D IN U ;)
I only know there are 25 letters in the alphabet, I don't know Y.
(Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?) -- (Friend: 11- T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T)
(Me: There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?) -- (Crush: No, there is actually 26.) -- (Me: oooOoh, I forgot u r a qt! So its acdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz?) -- (Crush: You forgot the D) -- (Me: That's not needed yet ;])
What letter is really hot? T
C = cOCK O = CoCK C = COcK K = COCk COCK = cock cock = COCK
ME SExUAL SRrY LoL
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.
One Erection would be a very nice name for a gay band.
Q: What's the best part about gardening?
A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.
What do teenage girls and happy meals have in common?
They both come with a toy.
Smoking a fag in the UK means to smoke a cigarette.
Smoking a fag in the USA means to kill a homosexual.
Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at a hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
Why did the farmer go to the strip club?
Because he was looking for his hoe.
Read this word:
Heroine.
Did you read it like the drug or like a female superhero?
Are you gay? "No." Oh, so you're not happy? "No." Oh...
They call it the Cold War because Russia is cold in 2 ways.
Depressed caller: "I'm done with everything!"
Responder: "Please hang on!"
Person 1: Goodness, when is Michael Jackson going to stop eating these white chocolate truffles? He is already making a goddamn mess on his bed eating a few of them.
Person 2: Well, he cannot resist the little white balls.
Your daddy must be a drug dealer, because you're dope.
What did the receptionist at the sperm bank say when you were leaving? "Thanks for coming!" 😉😉