Donald Trump

Donald Trump jokes

Dick

  • What do Donald Trump and a dick have in common?

    Liberals can't keep either one out of their mouths.

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  • Pedophile

  • Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.

    When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."

    His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"

    Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"

    10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"

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  • President

  • Young man: "Very good money, and how about the name of the stupid young man again?"

    Friend: "Dagobert Duck."

    Young man: "Ah, I remember. He was the American useless."

    Friend: "Ah, you mean Donald Trump?"

    Young man: "Yes, just like that! I know exactly how the guy managed to become president. Hahaha!!!"

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  • Charlie Kirk

  • President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."

    That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.

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  • Conviction

  • Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.

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  • Trump

  • Trump cut funding for Sesame Street.

    I think he's jealous that the characters on Sesame Street can count to 10.

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  • IQ

  • Q. What's the difference between Donald Trump and orange Jello?

    A. The Jello has a higher IQ.

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  • Bus

  • If Donald Trump gets any worse, they'll have to replace Air Force One with a short bus.

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  • Nazi

  • Donald Trump and Fanta both have some things in common.

    They are both orange and were conceived from Nazis!

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  • Joe Biden

  • Donald Trump secretly admires Joe Biden. How do I know?

    He attempts to imitate "Sleepy Joe" by falling asleep during his court cases and during part of the Republican National Convention!

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  • People

  • How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?

    He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!

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  • Lover

  • For all the talk of Donald Trump loving America, most of his lovers are imported from Eastern Europe.

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  • Girl

  • I'm shocked about Donald Trump escaping the transgender accusations. Trump is more talkative than any of the popular girls I went to school with! Not to mention Trump's tweets...

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  • Monica Lewinsky

  • "Monica Lewinsky has gone down on Bill Clinton several times. What's stopping her from having a one-night stand with Donald Trump?"

    "Trump is nothing more than a little pussy, don't ya know?"

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