Dead babies jokes
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
What's the difference between an apple and a dead baby?
I don't jizz on an apple before eating it.
What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of your mouth, while the other one doesn't!
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What's terrible? Three dead babies nailed to one tree.
What's worse than that? One dead baby nailed to three trees.
What's better than one dead baby?
Two dead babies.
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope? Stopping it with a shovel.
I am a dead baby. -end joke-
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
One's alive at the bottom.
What's even worse than THAT?
It eats it's way out.
Wait it gets worse...
It goes back for seconds.
Just one more I swear...
It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 100 dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
What do you call a dead baby?
Spawn killed.
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.
What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes.)
What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
I was going to tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.
Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They’re painful to look at.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.
What's the difference between the baby I just killed and Isaac Newton?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.
What's so great about dead baby jokes? They never get old.
What's worse than waking up with a dead baby next to you?
Realizing you were so drunk that you made love to it the night before...