Whats the difference between your dad and grocery shopping he didn't come back with the milk
Seeing one of her students making faces at others in the playground, Mrs. Matthews stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the teacher said, "When I was a child, I was told if I made ugly faces I would stay like that."
The student looked up and replied, "Well, you canβt say you werenβt warned, Mrs. Matthews!"
When someone says you're adopted, say, "But you're still at the orphanage."
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
An ugly, arrogant woman walked into a store with her 2 kids, yelling at them.
The store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children, are they twins?"
The ugly woman stopped yelling and said, "Hell no they are not, one is 9 and the other is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just bloody stupid?"
The clerk replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would screw you twice."
Took my receipt to the sperm bank so I can get this comeback
Comebacks when someone say: Bully: "Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic." Say: "At least its brighter than your future."
My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.
Bully: Hey virgin!
Victim: I'm not a virgin, just ask your sister.
Bully: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Victim: Just wait nine months.
I forgot what a boomerang was. Oh well, itβll come back to me.
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
Bully: I bet your dick is so small when you look down you can't see it.
Guy: I don't, I see your mom.
Why do orphans like boomerangs.Because they come back unlike their dad.
What ya call a boomerang that wonβt come back? A stick
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? What's there gone they never come back.
who is joe, you reply back who is candice, they reply back who is candice, you say candice nuts fit into joe mama's mouth
What do you say to a bully?
I might not be perfect, but at least I'm not you!
Well, if someone ever calls you gay ππ³οΈβπ, just say, "Well, at least I'm straighter than the pole your mommy dances on." π€£π
Woman: Whatβs a good comeback for my sexist husband when he tells me to go make him a sandwich?
Husband: I know! How about you COMEBACK with a goddamn sandwich?
Bully: "Nobody loves you."
Me: "Aww, it must have hurt when your mom told you that."
