Cleanup jokes
The twin towers are like water bottles.
It's all right if you knock them down as long as you pick up the mess.
How many people does it take to wash the dishes?
Only Juan.
This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.
There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!
We spend the weekend getting the poop out!
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
Roses are red, I need a broom, I just shit all over the bathroom.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his ass.
So, some thieves robbed me the other day. They took everything I owned, except for the soap, towels, and deodorant.
Dirty bastards.
What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
If I die, delete my search history.
I was thinking about you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
Community talk
Lock eyes from across the room Down my drink while the rhythms boom Take your hand and skip the names No need here for the silly games Make our way through the smoke and crowd The club is the sky, and I'm on your cloud Move in close as the lasers fly Our bodies touch and the angels cry Leave this place, go back to yours Our lips first touch outside your doors A whole night, what we've got in store Whisper in my ear t… Read more