Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
My dog went through my bathroom garbage, and for some reason, my sister put a bunch of ketchup packets in there...
Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?
Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Maserati.
Maserati who?
Why don't you clean up this Maserati?
Who do you call to clean up foul language?
A cuss-todian!
The other day all those toilet papers came by my house and asked do I have any crack candy. Naw, I don't have no damn crack candy or no crack apples. All I have here in the backyard is a peanut butter crack sandwich. Help yourself, and while you're at it, clean up all the damn doggie dodo that's everywhere. Thank you, Mr. Toilet Papers.
What do pigs use to clean up? Hogwash.
