Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*
Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?
Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me
When your girlfriend has been vomiting for 2 weeks and you find out she’s not pregnant Bf-*yes I knew it was a prank* She has cancer
Your gf/bf says: "Im dating your uncle..." Your start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Dam"
Every like this gets I will kill a telemarketer.
Every dislike I will kill a cute puppy.
Every comment I will kill your ex bf or gf and send you a PS5.
What do your BF and the twin towers have in common?
They both never get erect
*Me walk into the nail salon* Hi I'm here for my 3:45 appointment *nail tech* ok sweety come and sit down *Me sits down in the chair* *nail tech* you want long nail short nail? Um, long nail. You want boyfriend?!! Yes, ma'am. Ok, let me work magic. ok. *gives me short nail* bro I asked for long nail. But you said bf but u look lesbian* walks out without paying* *nail tech gives money to a customer* there u win. *customer* I told u she would
Not to be rude or anything but im not adopted my bf is and some of these are really mean because sometimes there parents give them up just because there ugly or just because of there skin color We should stop making fun of them and yes i do gigle sometimes but they can be relay hurtful sometimes
BF: Babe, I have two questions.
GF: Ok, ask!
BF: Where have you been all my life?
GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?
BF: Can you please go back there?
ex-bf's gf: your so ugly as hell me: oh did I mention that i was trying to be you
Imagine someone leaving a cut-out of Jeff Bezos on your car after you found out your blind bf cheated on you, and the McDonald's employee says over the speaker, "Weren't expecting him to see other hoes were you?"
But she hasn't tried the position with her new boyfriend. So she invites him to a romantic dinner. After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it. But her boyfriend was clueless about such acts. So she tell him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 positions. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same. But the bf didn't know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly the girl had an urge to fart, but hold it in because her asshole was right near his bf face. Suddenly she loses control, and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says
"Bitch if you think I'll be lying here for 67 more of those, you're fucking crazy."
Bf :- babe are you traffic police? Gf :- No Bf :- then why do you shout at me not wearing the helmet ?
If iI don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights wont be the only thing hanging from the roof
Hey I just wanna be in bed I just wanna stay ahead i just feel like i am dead and i like that color red hey i am not the big fat loser and your just a big accuser you user and excuser
Say this to you sister,toxic BF,Anyone :)
Awww gwen thinks she has a bf! o wait know ya don't! she is just some loser ass bitch who could be a ho you don't know, he was mine and I want him back!
hi ima girl gamer looking for a hot bf
Gwen if ur reading this the link I sent is for u and ur bf to chat and stuff no one shall bother u! Pinky pinky! Btw do U know how I am cause if do then I am related to kenya and my name starts with T? Don't worry just chat with ur boy friend
Hey who thinks Gwen and Aiden are not Dating and who also thinks this dumb girl named "Zre" is being a dummy! and Who thinks gwen belongs with prince aka bf!
i was at the club and thin my Dad walked up and said your 15 why are you high and at the club so i ran then my uncle was at the car and took me home so i was grouned then my boy friend came bc my parents wet out and we had sex and we where very loud my dad came home and walked in he had my bf pin me agenst the wall so my dad could spank me
Funny things or weird things to say to someone. Hey...have you kissed a girl before? Weird things to say to someone. Its hard to find friends that 91% Funny 100%Nice and 100,0000 % good-looking. Funny! Weird name to call a girl: Sweetums. Baby-Bugga-Boo.
Fuzzkins. Lumpy. Nilly. Ninty Minty. and SEXY WITCH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Gross thats why I am not getting a bf!
