And jokes
If you are disabled and a comedian, is it called stand-down or sit-up?
What wiggles and waggles?
A floppy dick!
So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."
And her mom said, "WHAT?!"
And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"
Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."
What do Michael Jackson and ACN have in common? They both go in little kids.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back...
Why can orphans give all you people posting all these stupid orphan jokes over and over again a good kick in the face?
Well, what are you gonna do, tell their parents?
P.S. Stop posting stupid orphan jokes over and over again.
Lol, the Twin Towers ordered a drop in from Pizza Hut, but instead they got a hot and ready from Jet's.
Bro, the Twin Towers got a hot and ready from Jets.
A doctor walks into his office and looks his patient in the eyes, "Sir, you have to stop jerking off."
The man asks, "Why?"
The doctor then says, "Because I'm trying to examine you."
I offered to share a meal with a homeless person once, but he said, "Piss off and buy your own!"
I hate the 9/11 jokes; my dad and grandpa were killed.
My dad was one hell of a pilot.
Grandpa was a hell of a planner.
What does a relationship and suicide have in common?
I always fail on committing.
Hey guys! I'm back! Sorry I didn't post yesterday! I had swim practice, and a bunch of homework, but here I am! And here is the quote of the day!
"Push yourself, because no one will do it for you."
Love y'all so much!
What does Kobe and the Twin Towers have in common?
The pilots just couldn't stick the landing.
Wow, that was explosive!
Man, I'm on fire š„ today!
Shorkey will find you in bed tonight, and he will eat you like my joke or else...
I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled, "Hot wheels!"
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Q: Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
A: Because all shows and movies have a cast.
EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL š±š± Scientists have created an element named Pessomium š³š³
Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama š”š¤¬ - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay š„µš¤§ - Finished š¹š¤ - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts š„¶