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And jokes

It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.

Wife: "Honey? What do you think about my teeth?"

Husband: "They remind me of stars... yellow and far apart."

You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.

Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

It’s about drive, it’s about power, We stay hungry, we devour, Put in the work, put in hours, And take what’s ours.

What do school shooting jokes and school shooting victims have in common? They never get old.

And together we will make America great again.

You were never great in the first place.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.

WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.

Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke a little leaf.

Jack got high and dropped his fly, and Jill said "Where’s The beef?"

Jack and Jill went up the hill to have some hankery panky.

Silly Jill forgot her pill,

And now there's little Frankey.

Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson & Neil Armstrong? A: Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson f@ck$ little kids in the a$$!

One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂

Q: What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan?

A: Apples get picked! 😱

My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.