American jokes
(Not an orphan joke).
Why are Americans bad at Clash Royale?
Because they've lost 2 towers.
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
In British chess I guess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without 2 towers.
Why do American guns only have 30 rounds?
Because it's the average class size.
Why do American guns only have 30 bullets?
'Cause that's how many kids are in a class.
So, in "Revenge of the Sixth" when Anakin goes and kills the younglings, I thought to myself, "Hey, it’s just another day in an American school."
When do Americans answer their door?
Once freedom rings! ❤️🤍💙
Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?
American: Self defense.
Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?
If you enter the bathroom as an American and leave the bathroom as an American, what are you in the bathroom?
A European.
What do you call the American healthcare plan for poor people?
Death.
Why are school shootings branded “very American”?
1. They usually happen in the USA.
2. They’re like the Fourth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming.
Why can't Americans play chess?
Because they're missing two towers.
Damn Americans, they fucking suck at Clash Royale.
Why are Americans bad at Clash Royale?
Because they have already lost 2 towers.
There are 3 men: an American, a French, and an Italian who have to take a trip and take the plane.
The American puts his hand out the window and says: "We are in America, I touched the Statue of Liberty." The French says: "We are in France, I touched the Eiffel Tower." The Italian says: "We are in Italy, I touched the garbage!"
I asked an American if their national anthem was "Pumped Up Kicks."
Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans? Because they already lost two towers.
If Joe Biden and Kamala Harris jump off a cliff, who survives?
Americans...
Why are so many Americans stupid? Because they shoot the ones that go to school.
My friend group is pretty diverse. I'm Japanese, one friend is Filipino, one is American, one is Italian, and the last one is German.
Out of everyone in the friend group, the Filipino and the American were the quickest to feel uncomfortable when I asked, "Who wants to go on a march with me?"