A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in Texas. The banks offered a reward for his capture, dead or alive, but offered a much larger award for the recovery of the stolen funds. An enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down. After a long and difficult search, he traced the bandit to his home town. On a hunch, he checked the town's cantina, and sure enough, there was the robber. The only other people in the bar were the bartender and a scrawny, older man at a back table. The time was right to make a move. The ranger drew his revolver, charged into the cantina, and announced: "You are under arrest. I get a reward for you, dead or alive. Tell me where the money is, and I'll let you live. If you don't, I'll shoot you right here, and save myself the trouble of having to take you back to Texas alive." But the bandit didn't speak English, and the Ranger didn't speak Spanish. As it turned out, the scrawny man at the back of the bar happenedd to be a lawyer. He knew the robber, and was bilingual, and quickly offered to translate for the two of them. The ranger said: "Tell him that if he doesn't tell me where the loot is, I'll shoot him here and now." Upon hearing what the Ranger had said, and seeing the cold look in his eye, the bandit knew that the Ranger meant it - if he did not give up his loot, he was a dead man. Terrified, the bandit blurted out in Spanish that the loot was buried in an old barn at the outskirts of town. "What did he say?" asked the Ranger. The lawyer answered: "He said, 'You don't have the nerve to shoot me, Yankee swine.'"
You travel to the past into the era where julius caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die? ̈
You reply with: ̈Surrounded by friends ̈
Yes Stephen hawkin is alive YEET
Stephen Hawking is ALIVE
Two men walked into a bar and one man asked for H20 and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
what would MLK junior be if he was white.........alive
Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do? A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!
when you have a box of dead babies in your garage and one of them is alive at the bottom and has to eat its way out but goes back for seconds.
What's the difference between steven hawkings and a baby - the baby is still alive'\
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
Me and my cousin went to a restaurant yesterday I ordered my chicken fried, he ordered his chicken alive
there were three men, and two of them died, the last man alive said " that's two less mouths to feed"
What's worse than a dead baby?- A pile of dead babies- whats worse than that? -The one on the bottom is alive.- And whats worst than that is, the baby has to eat it's way out
Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? -- It was a grave mistake.
Two men were talking about their wives. The first man says, "My wife is an angel." The second man says, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
