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Alabama

Alabama jokes

Sometimes I wish my gf was here, that way we could have some fun in my bed. Then I realize she's right across the hall. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA)!!

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    • Best friend: Dude, your sister is hot, I'd hit that.

    Me: Already did. SWEET HOME ALABAMA

    Two girls have a sleepover.

    Karen: Let's go to bed.

    Lauren: Fine, but it's early.

    *Karen wakes up and exits room*

    *Lauren hears noise*

    Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.

    Lauren: *laughs*

    Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Alabama.

    Alabama who?

    Alabama your cousin.

    Teacher: *Reads mythological story about a cyclops*

    Me: Does he have one eye cause he's from an incestual family in Alabama?

    Timmy: *grabs box of Trojans*

    Daddy:...

    Timmy: Well come on diddy!

    Daddy: Well shit lets go son!

    Both: YEE YEE

    SWEET HOME ALABAMA

    I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.

    She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.

    Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open. I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys. I asked and she said that’s my fam as well. I noticed an Alabama driver's license. I asked which one was her dad. She said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sex with the boss’s daughter. I casually asked what he did for work. Self-employed? She said that’s the last time I use ancestry.com!

    Visiting Alabama? Pop-up dating ads be like: "Never be lonely at cousinsonly.com."

    What did the Alabama graduate say to the Tennessee graduate?

    "Welcome to McDonald's, may I take your order please?"