I hate autistic people.
Worst Jokes Ever
Kelly Clarkson may be able to shed her weight [through pills], but she will never be able to shed the fact that she admitted herself that she molested her children when they were toddlers.
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
What’s a rapper’s favorite part of the house?
The rhyme cellar.
Why did the rapper visit the bank?
To get his RHYME CHECK.
Why was the rapper bad at basketball?
He could only dribble rhymes.
How do rappers stay cool?
They have MAD ICE!
What’s a booty’s favorite game?
Hide and cheek.
What do you get when you cross a butt with a phone?
A booty call.
What do you call a booty that’s always negative?
A pessimist-cheek.
Why did the booty break up with the fart?
It was just too much GASLIGHTING.
What’s a booty’s favorite type of bread?
Buns.
Why was the booty so good at poker?
Because it always had a good PAIR.
What did the booty say to the chair?
"You complete me!"
Sometimes I think back on all the people I’ve lost and remember why I stopped being a tour guide.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
What’s black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To get to the other side of the TRACK.
How does a rapper like his eggs?
Hard-boiled, to match his beats!
Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
What do you call a rapper who loves gardening?
Dr. Dre-seed.
