Worst Jokes Ever

What makes an ISIS joke funny?

The execution.

Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times, and she won’t believe you.

Tell a woman she’s fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life.

What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?

"Make me one with everything."

Why should you never trust atoms?

Because they make up everything!

Roses are red, the Jews hate goys,

Union of Creepy Janitors (UCJ) opposes school choice.

I joined ISIS to help my self-esteem issues.

Everyone kept telling me, "You’re the bomb!"

This morning I was beaten up by a busty woman in an elevator.

I was staring at boobs, and she said, "Press One?"

So I did...

I don't remember much after that.

How do you know a woman is blind?

Because she can’t see the kitchen or the laundry.

Your mama's so fat, she runs a trade deficit with food!

What's the difference between a Syrian kindergarten and an ISIS hospital?

I wouldn't know, I'm just the drone operator.

It only takes 4 inches to please a woman.

And it doesn’t matter if it’s credit or debit.

My mom came to me and shouted, "Nobody is giving me a fuck." So I went forward and fucked her!

Here is a jacket for my favorite Jew.

It says, "271032."

I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.

What do you call a black person?

Dark humor.

What the sigma?

Let's try to get to either max likes or dislikes, your choice.

And duck jokes, who would win in a fight, a baby or a pacifist, presented by duck?

"Explain bear is a homosexual, confirmed."

Boys: “Hey, can Billy come out and play baseball?”

Mom: “That would be fine, but he hasn’t come out of his room since Friday.”

Boys: “Have you checked the closet?”

Why did the gay guy say the n word? Cos he's retarded.