Worst Jokes Ever
Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.
The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
How do you win an argument against a emo? kick the chair.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
It's not that I don't get the laugh, but most of you need to read through what's already been posted, 'cause everybody's saying the same sh*t.
Q: What did one snake say to the other?
A: Nothing because they are both dead.
Yo mama so fat, she broke Usain Bolt's 100 meter speed record by taking ONE STEP!
Hit 'em with the 1, 2, Jeffery Dahmer!
"Sir, we're mining too many useless mineral ores."
Hitler: "Mine less, then."
Grammar Nazi bursts in: "MINE FEWER!"
Hitler looks over: "Yes?"
Roses are red, violets are black. Why is your chest as flat as your back?
Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.
Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.
best friend makes 9/11 joke.
you: "hey, my dad was inside the tower."
best friend: "I'm sorry."
you: "I always knew he was a great pilot."
Yo mama so fat, she needed cheat codes for Wii Fit!
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
A guy walks into a bar with a 44 magnum and says, "Who the fuck's been fucking my wife?" The room goes silent. The guy in the back finishes his beer and says, "You ain't got enough bullets."
Yo mama so fat that she needs two watches for two different time zones.
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.
An emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five... the tree left her hanging.
Slapped cheese on my white friend, told him I like cheese on my crackers.