Worst Jokes Ever
A cop pulls over a carload of nuns.
The cop says, "Sister, this is a 55 MPH highway. Why are you going so slow?"
The Sister replies, "Sir, I saw a lot of signs that said 41, not 55."
The cop answers, "Oh, Sister, that's not the speed limit, that's the name of the highway you are on!"
The Sister says, "Oh! Silly me! Thanks for letting me know. I'll be more careful."
At this point, the cop looks in the backseat where the other nuns are shaking and trembling. The cop asks, "Excuse me, Sister, what's wrong with your friends back there? They are shaking something terrible."
The Sister answers, "We just got off Highway 101."
What’s a German’s favorite drink? Orange Jews. Hundred percent concentrated.
What do you call it when a bunch of guys who look the same have an orgy?
A doppelgangbang.
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
Do you think when the Secret Service heard the gunshot they were like, "Donald Duck"?
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
An ugly, poor teenage girl found a genie lamp in her backyard. The genie said, "I will grant you 3 wishes, but under 1 condition."
"What is it?" she asked.
"After I grant your final wish, you have to have sex with me," the genie replied.
"Okay, for my 1st wish, I wish to be the prettiest girl at my school," the genie snapped his fingers and made her pretty.
"For my 2nd wish, I wish for my family to be rich," the genie snapped his fingers and told her her family is now the richest in town.
"And your final wish?" the genie asked.
"I wish I had a sabertoothed vagina."
What do you call it when a gorilla bumps uglies with an orangutan?
Monkeypox.
How do you throw a surprise party at the hospital?
Throw a strobe light in the epileptic ward.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
......
My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.
She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?
One does it for the cash, the other for the views.
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
What is the best way to kill a special ed kid?
Call them retarded.
Where does a black Eskimo live?
In a Nigglu.
Sparkling water was invented by Germans. Who else would add gas?
Why do Black people not like country music?
Because every time they hear "hoedown," they think their sister got shot.