Worst Jokes Ever
When you're in the war and you die and say to God, "Where is the gulag?"
What type of cake can orphans not have?
Homemade.
Depression hits harder than my dad.
The moment when she tells you: "I'm a virgin. Be gentle!" And you tell her, "Don't worry, I used to work with kids."
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
You're so poor you wash paper plates.
I saw this girl with blue hair and slapped her wrist and said, “NICE CUT G!”
What did Michael Jackson say?
Nothing, he's dead.
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium and you’re being a respectful friend.
But do it at home and you’re destroying evidence.
Better to cum in the sink... than to sink in the cum.
What did a cannibal have as his last meal?
Five guys.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...
They're both plastic and kids turn them on.
What is the difference between your girlfriend and your sister?
They're both "sweet home Alabama."
What do you call a Russian man with three balls?
'Whodya nikabollokov'
When you're a terrorist and you have a stutter.
A a a a a a a a ala ala ala ala ala alaog alaogbar.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
Roses are red, violets are blue.
YOU HAVE AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE WAITING FOR YOU...
I have a big bag of Doritos in the kitchen. It's only for people who are skinny, but the fat people can't have any. All they do is suck it up like a lollipop.