I make weed disappear, what's your super power?
What's the difference between taking a shit and the Ottawa police force?
Usually taking a shit only requires one ass wipe!
My friend asked me if I wanted to hang out by the tree later? I said yea I was gonna hang there
Why is an orphan afraid to play baseball? They are afraid the won't find home.
Teenager: OMG, I’m prego, my moms gonna kill me Baby: Lmao, same
Last week a girl asked me for sex. I had to disappoint her... so I said yes.
What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
These Ahfganistan people suck at Jenga
Why can't Orphans Play Poker? They Don't Know What a Full House is
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on
why can't orphans watch PG? they don't have any parental guidance
My Wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side So i crashed the car, then didnt talk to her for the rest of the day for no reason
9/11 was a round of clash of clans they knocked down 2 towers not 3
if 6 is afriad because 7,8,9 why 10 scared
(Because its in between 9/11)
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age. It was really heavy on me.
Roses are red, violets are blue, the last time people got depressed ended world war II
Spray and pray, also known as a priest with an altar boy
I'm gonna cut my life off\
I've got a job defusing landmines It's difficult, but hopefully soon I'll find my feet
Bro asian girls have the weirdest names i was fucking one and she kept on saying im tu yung
