Worst Jokes Ever
More expresso, less depresso. Jk, let's all drink bleach cuz life is a bitch.
What do a blonde chick and a turtle both have in common?
When they're on their backs, they're screwed.
What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?
They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"You have a great singer inside you."
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack can eat her candy. He got sick when he got a mouthful of dick and realized her name was Randy.
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
Everyone: So, wait, let me get this straight. Feminists want to cancel Father's Day because it is offensive to single mothers.
Feminists: Correct.
Everyone: Then what the f*** is the point of Mother's Day?
how do you cut of a hillbilly's dick?
kick his sister in the jaw
A guy does not know anything. Oh, wait, he has dementia.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pokemon?
People choose Pokemon.
What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy?
"Shhhhhhh, this might hurt a little."
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
My uncle died on 9/11. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.
Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.
What is Mexico's favorite sport? Cross country.
I bought an anti-bullying wristband. I say I bought it; I stole it off a fat ginger kid.
"Jack and Jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town, gave him a frown, and his arms were pricked."
Why did Ronald McDonald go to KFC to destroy them?
My impression of Michael Jackson's butler:
When answering the phone: "No, sorry, he's dead." *hangs up phone*