Worst Jokes Ever
Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.
September 11th. #BringYourPlaneToWorkDay
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV. His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuBuDuRDeEDeRdUuUuU!!!" "SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Why does Michael Jackson like twenty-eight year olds?
'Cause there are twenty of them.
What does a plug do when he's horny?
He jacks off!
What if Flappy Bird was with the Twin Towers?
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
In British chess I guess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without 2 towers.
If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?
This joke is unavailable due to the National Period of Mourning. Please return to this page on the 19th of September.
R.I.P. Queen Elizabeth II. 1926-2022.
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the opera.
I have a friend whose birthday is on September 11th.
They're going to have an explosive party that will definitely blow you away!
It's gonna be the bomb, and a blast, too!
How did 10 die?
Because it was in between 9 and 11.
I was going 80 in a school zone and the speed bump was screaming.
Why did Queen Elizabeth the II die?
Because she ran out of immortali-tea.
It's not nice to make 9/11 jokes. My uncle died in 9/11...
He was one of al qaeda's best pilots.
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
What is a prostitute's favorite form of traffic control?
Speed humps.
No matter how much I cry, the white people still left me hanging.
Did you hear about the guy that dipped his balls in glitter?
Pretty nuts, huh?