Worst Jokes Ever
"I'm thinking about killing off the main character in this book I'm writing."
"What type of book is it?"
"An autobiography."
I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had, I said, "Yes."
Like this post if you think pineapple belongs on pizza.
Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?
Draggin' these balls across your face.
Can you imagine The Count from Sesame Street having sex? "1 orgasm..., 2 orgasm..., 3 orgasm..., ah ah ah!"
What does 9 and 36 add up to?
A life in prison.
What does McDonald's and a paedophile have in common?
They both like sticking their meat in ten-year-olds.
Why'd the orphan cross the road? He was told his parents were on the other side.
When I was 17, my mom’s door was always locked. I wonder what she was doing.
What's the fastest thing on earth?
An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.
Hickory dickory dock. My wife avoids my cock. She's losing her and having an affair. So I had to slap Chris Rock.
Just accidentally emailed a porn link to a co-worker... So I emailed ten other co-workers the link and called it a virus.
Why don’t Chinese kids get to celebrate Christmas?
'Cause they're the ones making the toys.
Want to know how you make any salad into a caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.
Imagine Africans during a solar eclipse...
Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.
What is black and long?
A line at KFC.
What do a stripper and a coconut have in common? They both have a creamy center.
You're so skinny, you use chapstick as deodorant.
Little Herobrine, I'm cumming in ur mom! Call me Saddam Hussein cuz I'm dropping rap bombs!!