Worst Jokes Ever

What do you call an Asian who can't hear?

Wha U Sai

What do you call a white girl having a seizure? A vanilla shake.

Your family tree looks like a circle 💀💀💀

9/11 victims are the best readers.

They went through hundreds of stories in a few seconds.

Michael Jackson was recently sighted at Target. Why? The sale was all boys' pants half off!

If you get pinched by a man in a wheelchair, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"

You are so ugly, Hello Kitty had to say bye-bye.

What's the only part of a vegetable you cannot eat?

Wheelchair.

If you say to someone, "Have a nice day!" it will make them happy. If you say, "Enjoy the next 24 hours," they'll be terrified.

They found out that Michael Jackson was transgender, he went from he/him to hee-hee.

Father: "That's great, son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Tina, the neighbor's daughter."

Father: "Ohhh, I wish you hadn't said that. I have to tell you something, son, but you must promise not to tell your mother. Tina is actually your sister."

The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later:

Son: "Daddy, I fell in love again, and she is even hotter!"

Father: "That's great, son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Peny, the other neighbor's daughter."

Father: "Ohhhh, I wish you hadn't said that. Peny is also your sister."

This went on a couple of times, and the son was so mad, he went straight to his mother crying.

Son: "Mum, I am so mad at Dad! I fell in love with six girls, but I can't date any of them because Daddy is their father!"

The mother hugs him affectionately and says:

"My love, you can date whoever you want. Don't listen to him. He is not your father!"

A little girl being Girl: "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."

Priest: "What did you do, child?"

Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."

Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"

Girl: "Because he touched my hand."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)

Girl: "Yes, Father."

Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."

Girl: "Then he touched my breast."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)

Girl: "Yes, Father."

Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, Father."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)

Girl: "Yes, Father."

Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where)

Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!"

Priest: (after a few minutes): "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

Girl: "But, Father, he had AIDS!"

Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom... Until they are flashing behind you!

Why was JFK stupid? He only had half a brain.

If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?

Mr. Smith had four daughters. Each of his daughters had a brother. How many children does Mr. Smith have?

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar.

They should have ducked.

It must not be a good suicide story if you can tell it.

I am only here because me no like Blues Clues LGBTQ episode as I don’t believe in that. If you do, ok.

And it shouldn’t be a month, the month should be for all of the war veterans, it should be a day for pride. Companies only use this month for money; it’s exploitation because they don’t truly support, unlike me, in which I don’t support it.

I asked Michael Jackson when did he lose his virginity. He just replied with "HEHE!"