hey siri, skip to friday
me: breath right now if u wanna date me
Hey, guys! Just a quick reminder to spread kindness today. And treat others how you want to be treated! Rate your day scale of 1-10 in the comments below. Mine was about a 7. Also, can you guys please comment what you guys want me to cover in these little messages? Sometimes it's hard to tell if you guys like that I'm doing this kind of stuff or not.
when the feminists find out that it humanity not huwomanity
what kind of shells do tanks use to cheat? a-cheat shells
What do u call a fat indian sat on the floor? A meatball/malteser
Yo mama so old, her birth certificate expired.
Your hairline goes further back than your mums divorce
Sans:What do you call a skeleton snake? A rattler!
Sans:ha ha ha ha!!
What do u call a Muslim in a swimming pool? A bath bomb
Your hairline is so far back that even Hitler wouldn't shoot it
What is the difference between a gay person and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t start moaning and groaning when you try to put the meat in.
Yo mama so ugly, when she was born the doctor tried to put her back in.
Man: *steals drink Boy: bro😭😭 Man:why are u crying over a drink? Boy:that had dugs Man:....
Yo mama so dumb she failed the survey.
My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgent coming in tomorrow im super excited to work with him the next day we had to do our first ever open hart surgery so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient so we finished the surgery and went out side for a smoke and we were talking I said why did you keep the patients blood on your glove? He replied we in my free time I test it for anything diseases HIV the next day I got invited to his house and we had some drinks I said this is amazing red tea what is in it just the 2000 people you have cut opened .
Se this is the best thing about no such thing as vampires because I be the first person to say drinks are on me
He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".
"One man's trash is another man's treasure." It's a wonderful phrase, but a terrible way to find out your adopted :)
why cant orphans play baseball because they dont know were home is
