Worst Jokes Ever
A depressed guy walks into a bar and says, "Can I get shot?"
The bartender then says, "You mean, can you get a shot, right?"
The bartender then says, "Well... what drink would you like?"
The depressed guy then responds with, "No, I really want to get shot."
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
If Hitler had a cooking channel: Step one... Turn on the gas.
Oh well, I.H.N.! I.H.N.!! I.H.N.!!!
I got banned from the library for putting a book about woman's rights in the fantasy section.
I was gonna roast you about your chin, but I didn't know which one to talk about.
Hey, are you a terrorist? 'Cause I rate you 9/11.
How many police officers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They just beat the room for being black.
Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?
That's what happened to my dog.
Your mummy so skinny, she can't eat!
Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.
September 11th. #BringYourPlaneToWorkDay
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV. His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuBuDuRDeEDeRdUuUuU!!!" "SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Why does Michael Jackson like twenty-eight year olds?
'Cause there are twenty of them.
What if Flappy Bird was with the Twin Towers?
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
In British chess I guess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without 2 towers.
If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?
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R.I.P. Queen Elizabeth II. 1926-2022.
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the opera.