Worst Jokes Ever
A man is walking into the woods with a young boy.
Boy: “Hey mister, it’s getting dark out and I’m scared.”
Man: “How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.”
Welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make 'em, we take 'em!
Why can't orphans go to a school field trip?
Because he needs the parent's signature.
Why is the Tower of Pisa tilted?
Because it had more reflects than the Twin Towers.
Get a head in life by decapitating someone.
What’s a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.
You know what you could use? An orphan as a punching bag.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Q: What do you call America in a year? A: A wasteland.
Why can’t orphans f*ck their mom?
Because they don’t have one.
What is the difference between a cow and me?
Nothing.
Ok, I put one penny down. Do you smell anything?
1 scent.
I put two pennies down. Do you see any fruit?
2 pears.
I put three pennies down. Do you see any law enforcement?
3 coppers.
I put four pennies down. Do you see any cars?
4 Lincolns.
I put five pennies down. Do you see any pussies?
NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT!
Why did the astronaut bring the seeds to space?
Because he wants to planet the seed! 🤣🤣🤣
Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?
What can hold anything on the moon? A crater.
What is the difference between a normal joke and a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back.
Why do potatoes make good detectives?
Because they keep their eyes peeled!
A man tells his doctor, "Doc, help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!"
The doctor replies, "Sorry, I don’t follow you..."
I got kicked out of the hospital because I told all the Covid-19 patients to stay positive.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
"Killed two birds with one stone"? Pfft, I once killed two people with one bullet.