Worst Jokes Ever

What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?

Put them in a barking lot!

Hi, this is a good prank I did.

So, my brother LOVES his phone and so... I put it in the toilet and then flushed it, but it wouldn't go down. So, then I gave it to him and he threw it and then it broke. HAHAHAHAHAHA

(Prankster, tell me if you don't like me doing pranks because it is your thing.)

Bye guys! I hope you liked this prank! (And his phone did not really break, it just cracked really bad lol)

Add me on XBOX! Chalkyfrog11

Boy: Your dick is so small, oh wait, you don't have one.

Older boy: UNO reverse card!

Girls are like numbers squared. If they're under 13, just do 'em in your head.

What can't a sniper say to his wife?

"I missed you."

I gave an orphan 5 dollars and I said, "Spend it on a candy bar." I came back 5 minutes later and he didn't have a candy bar. So I look over and I see that he has a piggy bank that has 40 dollars and I said, "Where did you get that?" He said, "For being homeless," and I said, "What are you going to spend it on?" He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pay money for a mother."

When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a disco party. 🕺🕺🕺

What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?

They're both turned on by kids.

A man walks into a bar.

What do you say to a kid in a trash compactor?

You looking a little square.

Why did the baby cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken.

I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning.

Damn, I love being a sniper.

Give a man a match; he will be warm for hours.

Set him on fire; he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Before I die, I'm going to ask to be cremated.

Then I'm going to eat a bunch of popcorn kernels.

Then I'll die and get cremated. BOOM! I'm popcorn!

Just shut up!

Gwen is a liar. She said she is a Christian and then is saying bad, bad, bad, bad words. Shame on you, Gwen, LIAR!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

I like you, you like me.

Let’s go out and kill Barney with a big shot gun. Barney’s on the floor, no more purple dinosaur. 🌸🌸🌸🌺🌺🌺🥀🥀🥀RIP BARNEY

What do you call two Mexicans fighting? Juan on Juan.