500 hours jokes

A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They’re appalled by his haircut, his tattoos, his piercings.

Later, the girl’s mom says, “Dear, he doesn’t seem to be a very nice boy.”

“Oh, please, Mom!” says the daughter. “If he wasn’t nice, would he be doing 500 hours of community service?”

I've just been fired from the clock-making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.

Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.

Chuck Norris and Time had a race.

Result: Time is still running...

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.