100s jokes
Q: What kind of person has 100% ambition and never gives up if someone gets in their way?
A: A rapist.
What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A little get together.
I bet Steven Hawking $100 if he could catch me.
As soon as he said yes, I climbed up the stairs.
The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.
I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.
Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga.
And 100% of men don’t care.
Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.
How did you get into the tampon 100?
Pull some strings!
What is the difference between Paul Walker and the Queen?
Paul Walker passed 100 before he died.
I told my dad that I wanted to go to a college with a 100% acceptance rate and a 50% graduation rate, and he said, "Your mom doesn't count as a college!"
Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the Queen when you turn 100.
Instead, you now receive a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 14.
A man finds out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees.
Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says, “I can save you $100!”
@everyone.. what's so funny is that JIT thinks he's so "cool" and that everyone is "amazed" about him hating on people who is wayyy above him on the roster.
The pathetic part is that he hates on everyone else's family and relationships when 100% of us have a WAYY better one than he will ever deserve. He was born pathetic, and will die pathetic. So JIT, please tell me what it's like to be such a coward?
Why did Al Qaeda lose $100 on a bet?
They bet $100 that they wouldn't crash when they went through the Twin Towers.
Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.
Get the whip, you're out!
I'm 50% human, so that 50% stupid is 100% you.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an Aussie bloke in Bali?
Both are expert drunks, but the Aussie is 100 times better kept. Johnny Depp, in contrast, looks like a demented leader of a violent drug cartel.
What’s red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?
A frog in a blender.
Me: "My grandpa killed 100 nazis."
My friend: "Well, my grandpa killed Hitler."
A Muslim enters a building with 100 passengers and an airplane.