Worst Jokes Ever
I nailed my Jewish girlfriend so hard, she turned Christian.
6:30 is the best time on a clock... hands down.
5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe.
According to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
An atom loses an electron... It says, "Man, I really gotta keep an ion them."
The three unwritten rules of life:
1. 2. 3.
No matter how kind you are, German children are kinder.
Why didn't anyone react when the king farted? -- It was a noble gas.
My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles' elbow.
What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? -- People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooo.
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
9 out of 10 Americans are stupid... I'm so glad I'm in the 1%.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
I was going to buy a pocket calculator. But then I thought, who cares how many pockets I have?
What's the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? The hockey player showers after 3 periods.
Apparently, Monica Lewinsky didn't vote for Hillary Clinton this election. She said the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.
The furniture store keeps calling me back... But all I wanted was that one nightstand.
Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the sequence 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? -- Because Yoda was in charge of the sequence.
What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand? -- He nuts and bolts.
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.