When you got on an airplane, the flight attendant asked which hairline you were flying with.
Worst Jokes Ever
Your hairline retreats from your face just like all the guys that look at you.
Who is not hungry in Africa?
A dead person.
Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.
Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏
Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
My wife said I have no sense of direction.
I said, "Where did that come from?"
Yo mama so fat, she fell off the judgement room and broke the 7 layers of hell.
One day, little Johnny woke up to get a drink of water. He passed by his parents' bedroom and noticed sheets bouncing. He asked his dad what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." Little Johnny said, "Who is your partner?" Dad said, "Your mom." On his way up, he passed by his sister's room and noticed sheets bouncing around and asked what she’s doing. She said, "Playing cards with my boyfriend, Paul." The next day, Dad came to ask Johnny a question. The father noticed Johnny was still in bed and asked him what he was doing. He saw the sheet bouncing and asked Johnny what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." His dad asked him who his partner was. Little Johnny said, "You don’t need a partner if you have a good hand."
Edward Robinson + Grant Wisler = WHAT THE FU**?
What do you call it when you choose Panera Bread over something else?
Panera instead.
Nah, North Korea got inspired by the fatman nuke that he also became a fatman with nukes.
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
How does a rapper fix stuff?
With a RAP-AIR!
What do you call a rapper who LOVES winter sports?
Ice Cube.
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.
What do you call it when Panera Bread decapitates someone?
Panera Behead.
What do you call it when someone lies to Panera Bread?
Panera misled.
What do you call it when Panera Bread commits genocide?
Panera bloodshed.
What do you call it when Panera Bread goes to space?
Good question.
My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.
What if Game of Thrones and Harry Potter antagonism had a child?
Coldemort!
