Worst Jokes Ever
When you die, people cry and wish you to come back.
But when you do, people scream and run away.
Q: What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
A: You slap her.
(amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!
My uncle died on September 11. He was the greatest pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
How do women make you a millionaire?
When you're a billionaire.
"Would you like to play the rape game?"
"No wtf" she replied.
"That's the spirit!"
A woman marries a man and has 7 children. The husband dies, and she marries another man. She has another 7 children, and later the husband dies. A year later she gets married again, and has another 7 children. She dies after a few months.
At the funeral, a man sees the priest looking at the heavens. He walks over and hears the man say, "They're finally together again." The man looks at the priest and says, "With her husband?" The priest looks at the man and says, "No, her legs."
How do you blindfold an Asian? String!
How to tell if you're depressed? You came to a website called "worst jokes ever.com" looking for a quick smile.
I was just chilling in the World Trade Center and got airplane wifi.
A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, "Anything you say can and will be held against you." The man replies, "Boobs!"
I asked my dog this morning how her week's been going--she said "ruff." I feel her, you know? I feel her.
First of all, if a woman sues Bill Cosby for drugging and rape 50 years ago, and she could still remember it, it couldn't have been all bad.
The difference between George Floyd and Kobe Bryant is Kobe got air.
A TikTok I saw: "I'm in Canada, I'm in the United States!"
Most people: "I'm in South Korea, I'm in Nor- *boom*"
Me: "I'm in Palestine, I'm in Is... this heaven?"
*Insert me starting a war in the comments*
What did Hitler and Usain Bolt have in common?
They both finished the races.
I revealed my dick to my girlfriend.
As she saw it, she said, "Nevermind, just finger me."
The suicide hotline didn't even give me advice on how to kill myself. Not helpful at all.
Why is a bee's hair so smooth and sticky?
Because they use honeycombs.
Nike isn't helpful for suicidal people. You can't tell them to "Just Do It."