Worst Jokes Ever
The first child, Daisy, asks her mother why she is named Daisy. The mother said, "That's because a daisy fell on your head when you were born."
The second child, Raindrop, asked why he is named Raindrop, and the mother said, "That's because a drop of rain fell on your head when you were born."
Then the third child, Cinderblock, said, "fxg,kxf dsdsvtg,hjer,btjh,rbtsvikvsdtxde43f."
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
Osama Bin Laden is his name.
Crashing planes is his game.
I went on a dating site looking for arsonists.
I found a lot of matches.
Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.
what's flat and great for cutting? me.
My dad has a pretty shitty job.
Who needs parents to be great?
Q: How do you know if an Asian broke into your house?
A: All your homework and the Rubik's cube you spent a year on and still can’t solve is solved. 🤓🤓🤓🤓
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pepperoni, and they only got plane.
You see a kid on the side of the street crying, so you go up to them and say, "Where are your parents?" The kid says, "What are parents?"
What do you call a pole dancer?
A stripper.
My friend: I want to cut myself.
Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.
The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"
Why is the UK bad at chess? Because they already lost their queen.
What is a orphan's favorite song?
"We Are Family."
Why didn’t the grape 🍇 leave her family?
Because she loved raisin' kids!
What is an orphan's most relatable movie?
"Home Alone."
What superhero will orphans never understand?
Homelander.
Why can’t orphans build anything?
Because they can’t go to Home Depot.