What did the parrot say when it saw a duck?
"Polly want a quacker!"
Worst joke ever.
Where did the king hide his armies?
In his sleevies.
Worst joke ever.
Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?
Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.
That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
Two of the worst jokes ever.
What's the worst part about getting old?
Going to pull up the wrinkles in your socks, just to find out you're not wearing socks!
I entered Kian's house. At the top of the stair, I was greeted by my greatest fantasy, JOHN. He said in a manly tone, "Hello there." I walked slowly up the stairs and greeted him back. As I walked past his room, I felt uneasy. I walked into Kian's room to find no one. I turned around and gasped. John is standing there, a bulge had appeared and poked me as he got nearer. He pushed me onto Kian's bed. The bed was that bad it broke as I fell onto it. John says, "A broken bed is nothing to worry about." I look up at him in disbelief, he's more masculine than I thought. He thrust himself onto me, his crotch area sticky to the touch. He then ripped a fart as he bent over, at this point I knew it was too late John, the fart he ripped (sticky to the touch) had me so in shock I wasn't ready for what was next, he picked and jumped on my head ripping the most monstrous, enormous, deadly, sticky to the touch fart I'd ever seen, it knocked me out. I awoke to find I was in the WALLS. I looked out to find I was in the glory hole, my worst nightmare had become reality, I fully understood my purpose in life was to the holy glory hole, I heard "GRANDAD CAN I GET SOME V-BUCK" I then knew I was in for some Kian treats.
The end
I just watched a program about beavers. It was the worst dam program I've ever seen.
My teacher asked what was the worst time you got paddled by your parents. My one friend said that he got in trouble and got whacked by a stick. I raised my hand and said that my dad whacked me with his dick.
Just walked in on my parents doing it! Worst 30 minutes of my life.
Today; worst day ever.
My annoying sibling got hit by a train, and I lost my job as a conductor.
I knew the human race made mistakes, but you're the worst I've seen so far...
I had the worst day of my life. My 13 year old ex got killed and I got fired from my job as a police guard. Did I mention that we were in Syria?
What's worse than 2 dead babies in a trash bin? Two babies in one trash bin.
Whats the worst thing about eating a shaved pussy
Putting the diaper back on
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
This is supposed to be worst puns but most of them are not puns.
What's the worst part about microwaving vegetables?
Fitting the wheelchair in.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
It took Jesus 3 days to respond.
Worst lag ever!
What's the worst thing about having a Congolese friend?
He always needs a hand.
