Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh. he never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "that's my step ladder" he said "I never knew my real ladder."
What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? Snap-on tools
I wanted to bomb a restaurant so i went in there with a bomb...but the bomb got diffused and did not work . I asked a person standing nearby i said. "" hey do you know how to fix this bomb so i can blow up this place? "" He gave me a book. It was the quran I said what the hell is that..! He said, " this is the official manual for bomb making."
My Friend- Why does Santa look like that? My 15 Year Old Friend- He has secateurs cancer... Me- I heard its cause he comes once a year. *-Everyone Looks at me-*
What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
Thumb nails.
Q: What kind of Christmas music do elves like? A: βWrapβ music
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
