Roses are red, violets are blue, this poem doesn’t make sense, washing machine.
Three nuns are on their way up to heaven after having been involved in a terrible minibus crash on the Italian Alps that killed them and the driver (he went the other direction!).
As they're approaching the Pearly Gates to be interviewed by St. Peter, they are requested by an attendant to form a single line and wait. Sister Agnes is first, Sister Bernadette behind her and Sister Carmel on the end.
Finally, St. Peter approaches the nuns to determine their worthiness for entry to Heaven.
He says to the first nun: "Sister Agnes, have you ever seen the penis of a man?"
Sister Agnes bursts into tears and says: "Yes, St. Peter, I have, but please don't let this prevent me from entering the Kingdom of Heaven."
St. Peter says: "Never fear, my child. Say a thousand Hail Marys and then go over to that font of Holy Water and wash your eyes out, then you shall enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
Sister Carmel sees what's going on and taps Sister Bernadette on the shoulder, somewhat urgently.
"Pssst - hey Bernie"!, she says.
Sister Bernadette asks: "What is it?" A little annoyed.
Sister Carmel says: "Do you mind if we swap places"?
Sister Bernadette replies: "What for"?
Sister Carmel says: "Well, I wouldn't mind gargling before you stick your ass in there!"
What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker?
I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.
Yo momma so dumb, she washes her dishes in the river.
A man with 20 dollars walked into Dave & Buster's. He went to the bathroom to wash his hands. He walked out without any clothes but still has his money.
What do you call a washed vegetable?
A disabled kid that needs a towel.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
"I need help, George Sink," said Jimmy.
"What is it?" said George Sink.
"Can you wash my dishes?" said Jimmy.
Yo mama so fat and old, she lifted her boob to wash under it, and a pilgrim fell from under it.
