Twenty Dollar Bill jokes

Did anyone around here lose a roll of twenty-dollar bills wrapped with a rubber band? Because we found the rubber band.

Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn't believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.

I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money.

Last night, I fucked a chick named Penny. What are the odds?

I heard an Uber from your eyebrows to your hairline is like $40.

Two pedophiles talking to each other:

"Do you got two fives for one ten?"