The jokes
Jayfeather walks across the street, sees glass smash, runs down the street, and there lies a body... What?
Why didn't the teddy bear want to go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.
One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."
Gwen just wanted to help you with the bullying.
Tip 1. Ignore them; bullies are really just cowards.
Tip 2. Stand up for yourself; it's ok for people to also help you, but you do the same for yourself!
Tip 3. Just let them be; they're just stupid!
Love you-Iariah
What is the difference between an orange and an orphan?
The orphan always gets picked... Oh wait, I meant an orange always gets picked.
What is the cheapest meat?
"Deer balls," they're under a buck!
Why did the rhino eat the car?
Poop.
Yo mama is so fat she turned the mermaids to fishes.
I used to have an imaginary friend who I could talk to, and he could grant me wishes and stuff... and then I stopped going to church.
What's the difference between a hippie chick and a can of Spam?
After 6 months in the woods, you'll still eat the can of Spam.
I don’t drink, don’t swear, don’t smoke, shit, I left my cigarettes at the fucking bar! (Andrew Dice Clay.)
Jokes for the family to enjoy.
What's the difference between a dick and a rock?
One's hard.
Why are Americans bad at chess? Because they have already lost two towers.
Someone bullied a disabled person.
The disabled person said they can't stand it.
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
I hate the 9/11 jokes; my dad and grandpa were killed.
My dad was one hell of a pilot.
Grandpa was a hell of a planner.
What did the mouse say after its bath?
"I feel squeaky clean!"
What's a benefit of being an orphan? The chips always come in a family size :)
What do orphans call a family photo? A selfie.