The jokes
Did you guys know that Chancellor Palpatine is suing Nike?
Apparently, the company stole his slogan: Just "Do It."
What's the difference between an orange?
A hippopotamus riding a four-door motorcycle.
Quote of the day:
Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.
[Comment your favorite fall beverage!]
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
Did Mr. Rusher play tennis in the dark?
You will get hit by the tennis ball! Ouch, Mr. Rusher said.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
He didn’t want to pay the gas bill.
What did the lettuce say to the carrot?
"Lettuce be friends!"
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face.
Then he stopped and had sex again x6, now he was left with...
Why was the soldier reading the Geneva convention?
To-do list.
So 6 is scared of 7 because 7, 8, 9, but why did 10 have PTSD?
He was stuck in the middle of 9/11.
Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.
Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
Why did the child cross the road?
Because he didn’t wear a seatbelt.
Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?
Because they go down so well.
Hitler was the most handsome man alive.
Everyone died for him.
I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.
Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?
Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)
Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.
Me: *Confused*
Sister: They're both horrible.
The only difference between my grandma and the twin towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
The Twin Towers collapsed faster than my grandma did.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and shivers?
A nervous wreck.