The jokes
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.
You go h dichotomy lol what do you want to what what’s the name for the address for sure what’s what I name it says I name it lol I don’t o I have to get r CB n nu set set e Okay okay I’ll be at my place.
I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.
Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"
What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"
What has eight legs and leaves kids alone? The Jackson 4.
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."
When Peter Pan jumped off the Twin Towers, what happened? He Neverland.
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
How did the lesbian die? Homicide.
How did the gay man die? Homicide.
Why did the orphan become a criminal? It wants to be wanted.
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
To be wanted.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Ok, wanna hear another one? Okay. Knock knock. (Who's there?) The chicken from the other joke.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Jack and Jill Went up the hill to have some hanky panky.
Silly Jill forgot her pill. And now there's little Franky.
What does a pencil and a plan have in common?
They were both in the Twin Towers.
What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?
I've been raped!
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your dick into someone's asshole.
A dolphin swims into a bar and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.