The jokes
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?
Nothing, they're both receding.
The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.
When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
A police officer pulls over two Catholic priests. He says he's looking for two child molesters.
The Catholic priests look at each other: "We'll do it!"
Why can't Asians play cricket?
Because they will eat the ball.
Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."
Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."
Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."
Teacher: "*stands up*"
Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."
I had a cake for my gender reveal party. I cut it, and the inside was yellow...
Roses are red, Violets are fine, You can be the six, And I can be the nine.
What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?
They both fall in September.
What happens when the Twin Towers breathe? They collapse like an orphan with stage 4 cystic fibrosis who lives in the streets of Africa.
Turn the comments into a kindergarten fight.
The Titanic movie cost $200 million dollars to make, meanwhile the Titanic ship cost $400 million to construct.
Titanic was made by Paramount and 20th Century Fox. CHEAPSKATES!
The Kardashians are just hyper realistic Barbies.
Adam and Eve had 3 male children, the only children on Earth. How did they reproduce?