The jokes
What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?
They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.
A vegan and a transgender jump off a cliff to see who will hit the bottom first.
Who wins?
Society.
It's a shame Iran doesn't know how to restrain Israel. If only they had Hitler's expertise.
Now he really would be THE FINAL SOLUTION!
Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.
When we take a family photo, you are the background.
How to escape your black school teacher in detention?
(Easy)
Turn off the lights!
If your parachute fails midair, remember, you have the rest of your life to fix it.
Go to soyjak.party for the funniest memes and soyjaks.
109 countries can't be wrong. Watch Europa: The Last Battle.
Obese is the N-word for fat people.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There used to be two, but now it's a sore subject.
I played the Angry Birds theme while watching a 9/11 documentary.
I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?
Women have eggs and milk in them...
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
What do women and pools have in common?
They both cost a lot of money to maintain for the amount of time you’re inside of them.
A boy sat in his bed, watching a meteor shower. He was a vengeful child and wished that his parents would no longer bother him whilst he was gaming.
The next morning, he woke up to find his mother had passed away in the night. Clearly his wish had worked. However, his father worked a midnight job, and as such the boy was very confused when he returned home from work, expecting him to have met the same fate.
The two of them then looked out the window in thought, only to find the milkman lying dead on the pavement.
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.
Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.
After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.
What's the worst possible thing to be playing during the funeral of a bridge-collapse victim?
Fall Guys.