The jokes

Papyrus: Sans, stop being a lazy Bones.

Sans: Why bro, guess you don't have the back bone to do anything, heheh.

Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill's candy.

Jack got a big shock with a mouth full of huge cock, because Jill's real name is Randy, and she had no candy, just he gave Jack a handy.

Why did the bean play Fortnite?

Because it had a beantroller.

People say I should be proud of my autism, but truth be told, I'm only in it for the help in class.

So, a mom and a dad take their son to a therapist.

“What seems to be the problem?” the therapist asked.

“Our son thinks he’s a refrigerator!” they said.

So the therapist replies, “Oh dear, that must be a problem.”

“Yeah, he sleeps with his mouth open, and the light is really bright.”

Here are some skeleton jokes.

You know the average person tries too hard and works himself to the bone.

If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone, I can give you a real humorous joke.

I used to play the trumpet, now I play the xylo-bone.

I'm always happy; nothing gets under my skin.

I made you some turkey for lunch. Bone appetit!

I'm glad I had you; I'm no longer bonely.

I've got a skele-ton of more jokes, but I'm just giving you one more.

Did you hear about the skeleton ninja? He was very skullful (skillful)!

A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "You're adopted!" The sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"

Yo, forehead is so big...the photo on yo driver's license says "to be continued on the back."

What do a 14 year old and the fetus inside her both think?

"Man, my mom's going to kill me!"

Why does the mushroom 🍄 have many friends?

Because it’s a fungi.

Why was your mom so into me?

'Cause she was the man.

I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to join my family tree... She dropped the rope and ran.

Don't go to ghostposter.com. The person or persons who run that site are a fucking bunch if dumb fucking cunts who can suck my big cock.

That one teacher that flips on and off the light switch to get the students' attention... that one kid with epilepsy...

Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

Because he got stuck in a crack.

Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?

A: Nothing! He was hung over.

Two muffins are sitting in a bar.

The first muffin says to the bartender, "I'll have the usual."

The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans, and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human-like structure, muffins lack brains, which are an essential part of being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also, with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak, thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.

What's the useless skin around the vagina? A woman.

Student: Why does everyone hate me?

Another student: Because U got the A last night.

What do you call a letter using the bathroom?

The P.