The jokes
All the lines on the LGBT flag are straight.
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
Q: What's the difference between a grandma fetish and necrophilia?
A: A few weeks.
She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed!
And I blame it on the al-al-al-cohol, but if I were you, I wouldn’t kiss your mom on the mouth at all.
Cause she loves to toss the salad even though she ain’t a chef!
But your mom's the best, the super M.I.L.F.
Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.
She later made me a sandwich, and she cut the crust off it.
Yeah, she called me "Pledge" because I knocked the dust off it.
She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.
Five minutes later, she agreed to get with me, so we went and rocked the minivan like, "Giggity, Giggity, Giggity!"
I approached her in the checkout line and said, "Yo baby wassup?"
I first saw her in the Walmart picking out your drawers.
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To visit the ugly witch's house.
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
The chicken!
Sometimes I wish my gf was here, that way we could have some fun in my bed. Then I realize she's right across the hall. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA)!!
What's the difference between me calling my girlfriend a pedophile and her calling me one?
Oh wait, I am because she's 10.
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake?
She died the next weekend.
What did the cow say to the prostitute?
Moo.