The jokes
What’s the difference between 1000 used tires and 1000 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.
What’s black and sits on top of the stairs?
Christopher Reeves in a house fire.
The Twin Towers and genders have a lot in common. There used to be two, and now it's just a touchy subject.
There once was a commie called Ed. Usually known as Ned. He went to bed, Got shot in the head, Unfortunately now he was dead.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
They wanted somebody to call "daddy."
What did the fork say to the cake?
A: "I want a piece of you!"
A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!
The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"
What do you call a skunk falling from the sky?
A stink bomb!
I went shopping, and then to the hospital, and then to bed, and then I promised to only say "and" once in a sentence.
What's the difference between a baby and a pizza?
One does not crow when you put it in an oven.
The Octopus joke! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Ahh, the coronavirus!
Look at the bright side!
The worst is behind us.
Mom: I was an orphan once. The kid: Oh, ok, idgaf. Mom: And you're gonna be too! :) The kid: Ok, idgaf- WAIT WHAT THE FU-
Your mama so fat the flash died halfway running around her.
A delivery service called “Ross Deliveries” was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
If it's true what they say and I quote, "God never gives you more than you can handle," then you should pray to those who didn't, that God gave them a body strong enough to survive the attempt.
Me: Imagine not having hair.
Kids: On chemo.
Bitch the fuck.
Corona be like:
Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.
*snap*